Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
