what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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