Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
