please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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