is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
