Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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