Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
