what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
