Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
