You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
