id be glad to
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
