think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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