do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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