we have pet lesbian snakes
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
