so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
