how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
