you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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