New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
