We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
And then he peed in my hair
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