I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
