Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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