I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
