I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
