In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Randomize
