the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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