? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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