GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Panties = found
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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