Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
