and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
