When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
