If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
