But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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