so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
