yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
