i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
