So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you didnt know i had herpes?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
