garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
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