think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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