She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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