I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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