The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
