don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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