Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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