69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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