Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
