she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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