Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
