He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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