Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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