it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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